Void

Paranoia, people often overuse that word, but I genuinely do get paranoid everytime when stakes matter. I fumbled today during my soft skills class for example, nearly lost my composure in the staff room, and I don't know how many instances this has happened. I don't know, I find escape in the pages of my books, the tunes of my songs, but I feel I don't need to find escape in these things and should rather learn how to face the real world instead. I need a comfort person whom I can share these things too lighten myself, someone who can be there for me, I heard that's one way to kill paranoia. I get overwhelmed very easily but while doing something, I can multitask, I usually listen to music while reading or studying, watch a series while writing my notes/files. I don't know, just want to fill that void in my life that will eventually kill off this paranoia, because seeing everyone happy, enjoying their life with their loved ones gives me major FOMO. 
Hopefully someday.
Hopefully